Posted by: austend | Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Biblical Masculinity & Femininity

Thoughts from Rick Holland on Biblical Masculinity & Femininity from his 12-09-07 sermon at Crossroads from I Peter 3.7:

“Masculinity and Femininity are always made clear in the Word by means of contrast: men with women, boys with men, and girls with women.”

“You cannot blame your emotional scars or your childhood or anything else for the way you are. You are still called to be a Man or a Woman, no matter what you have gone through in your life that would impede that.”

“’Weaker’ means ‘fragile’ and ‘vulnerable’ not ‘inferior.’ It is a comparative word. It’s not saying that she is weak, but that she is weaker than the man. The man too is weak.”


“It is true that submitting can leave you vulnerable and potentially in trouble, but you are called to do it anyway.”

“Women, don’t assume anything about a man’s interest in you unless he explicitly tells you.”


“How you relate to a woman is the ultimate definition of your manhood—and not just any woman; not your mom or your sister; but your wife—the most intimate woman in your life. How do you treat your mother? There is no threat of losing her. After your wedding day, when there’s no threat of losing your wife, you’ll treat her as you do your mother.”

“Though the man is in authority and not under authority, Peter uses ‘in the same way’ to indicate that the husband is to submit as the wife submits to him.”

“Remember that your wife is called to submit to YOU. How hard a job is that!”

1) Lead with a submissive heart. (Submit to those over you)

2) Consideration. (Understand the challenges of your wife’s role and gender. The command to understand women is given to the men. Men have that responsibility. Women don’t ‘need’ to understand men. Men are easy to understand. Understand your wife personally. Understand her likes, dislikes, dreams, expectations, what makes her happy, what discourages her, what tempts her. You should be an expert on her.)

3) Veneration. (The best part of his life is his marriage to his wife. Marriage itself may be the ‘grace of life’ in the verse. The wife is God’s reward and gift to the husband. Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.” Ecc 9.9. Make her life exponentially better because she is married to you. Marry her because she is THE BEST, not the best among your options.)

Being Single:

“You cannot wait to get ready for marriage until you walk down the aisle or when you like someone. You must be objective at those times, so you must have already worked out your own convictions on marriage and relationships before you find yourself in one.”

“The same person you are entering the chapel is the same person you are leaving it with a gold ring on your finger.”

“Every relationship has risk, but, men, don’t try to ‘understand’ a woman too soon in that relationship. You are called to understand your wife, not every woman.”

“Learn to live understandingly with women now before you’re married or in a relationship.”

“Get to know one another without committing your whole lives to each other.”

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